Friday, March 27, 2009
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
So in no particular order I decided to compile some of my favorite memories, that I can remember at least...all from the TENDERLOIN/Nob Hill
- My 20th birthday party, I went with a bunch of friends to Deco Lounge in the TL, the whole night super coked out I kept complaining to old men how I felt old and was depressed, then they would ask me "How old are you turning today" and I would sigh and reply "twenty." I had fun with it but the best part was a birthday blow job I got in the basement later that night
- When I lived in Nob Hill, while walking home on a MONDAY night no later than 9 PM, I walked past a first level apartment with the window cracked open and the blinds pulled up just enough so my ex and I could see in, Thank God to our surprise it was a group of about 10 hipsters sitting around doing coke BLASTING The Cranberries, just enjoying life, we were so tempted to knock on the door but instead ended up in bed watching Chelsea Latley.
- While still 20 one night I got asked to sit in for the door guy at my roommate's Tuesday night party in the TL, free drinks, flirting with straight men by drawing peen on their hands and I let in every cute underage boy that came my way, including my 17 year old crush. Plus I made like 20 bucks and bought some valium with it.
- Days before my 21st after being up all night at various parties on a Sunday Night, we ended up at the Gold Dust Lounge at its opening hours at 7 in the morning already out of our minds for some breakfast mimosas, this guy kept telling me all night how much he liked me which turned me off then told me he was waiting for me to break up with my boyfriend so he could get with me, disgusted, I took another boy to the bathroom made out took out his cock and gave him a half of handjob before i got thirsty again, got another mimosa then trekked home with my then semi roommate. Stumbling out trashed we were lucky enough to catch the passing by cable car with all the tourist staring at us at 8 am, we proceeded home only the entire 8 blocks only to stop for more champagne and a cartridge of nitros.
SOOOO much more to tell, champagne fountains, dolores days, geary club, the phonebooth, la rondalla, radio habana, booze cruises...I don't even know where to start but I guess those were some of the freshest memories still lingering.
basically....STEP IT UP PHILADELPHIA!!!! I miss you SF!
Monday, March 23, 2009
So the deadline for submissions draws near, and then CUM RAG enters phase 2! Editing! Probably not nearly as fun as phase one with the naked straight men, champagne interviews, meeting tons of new people, but we want this to be quality and fun for us and everyone else. We are cutting things close but have to make sure each submission is as hot and thick as then next. But things are coming along, thanks to everyone who reads so far and has given us positive feedback it really helps us when times are hard.
A little update...
-good pictures of scantily clad straight men
-interviews with some amazing bands
-submissions are well on their way from the land of Brooklyn's from an inspiration ally hot zine writer, our tall drink of whiskey fiction editor will blow yr mind with a short piece he wrote, some adorable skinny fags from our own Philadelphia and from the land down under from a sexy incredible Vegemite eating film maker!!
-Our own Cum Rag editors throwing in our 2 cents where ever we feel
-Some bleach blond drag queen astrologer to the stars will answer all your occult needs
and i'm sure im forgetting something amazing
but we been doing our best to keep this updated and work hard.
April 18th at the bike stop we will release the final copy of her. so wear you're best witch wear or nothing but a toe ring and a smile and get trashed, celebrate America and freedom kiss us. We also MIGHT release her at a party in NYC...
But before then come check us out at the dive in south philly every 3rd thursday, playing 80's punk/riot grrrl/77/electro/disco/grunge/whatever else as we get drunk
We will also be dj-ing Pi Lam's human bbq on April 4th, come get wasted and suck a college dick!
MORE UPDATES and previews SOON!!! Hopefully flyers too!
love ya bitch
Xavier, Kevin and Alex
Thursday, March 19, 2009
what fag doesn't love a crazy haired, chain smoking, cat eye glasses wearing, old wench?...infact, reminds me of some of my closest girlfriends...
She is also a slut but embraces it...BTW I REALLY DO WANT A MAGIC BULLET
come to the dive tonight...Cumrag Boys will be dj-ing...what dj name do you think is better...Uncle Bano or Dj Powerbottom?
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Friday, March 13, 2009
I tried to get change and the dude behind the glass pointed at a sign that said "Exact Fare Only." Luckily the train had arrived with perfect timing, and i hopped that shit and ran in, giving the SEPTA clerk a big fuck you.
i sat down, feeling sort of out of my mind and still halfway drunk from the night before. Across the train was a late 20s something business man eating a hot dog. He was hot, great jawline blue eyes. I replaced the hot dog with a mental image of a throbbing dick. Imagining him really enjoying this raging boner in between two buns, topped with "mancraut", instead of the sour kind. Poor guy had no clue that somebody was getting off to him having a quick bite to eat.
Do i look that hot when i'm eating a hot dog? do older men walking passed me feel their meaty gristle throb while i enjoy this fine german treasure? do they imagine me eating more than one at a time, or perhaps they want me to feed them these delicious sausages through a hole in the library bathroom...
i hop off the train and walk across the street to put these questions to the test. I pay 1.25 for a medium sized hot dog. ketchup, mustard, extra mayo. I walk towards the bus stop and go to town on this meat treat. Taking little bites, and inconspicuously eye fucking every passer byer. Men, women and children.Absolutely no living creature is safe for these next twelve minutes. This is the longest its ever taken me to eat one of these. Sitting down at the stop, i noticed a dude staring. He probably still lives at his moms house and has her bleach out the shit tracks from his over sized underwear hes had since he was 15. Not hot. I want to tell him that while he watches me eat my hot dog, my loins are crying.
Instead i looked down and noticed all the extra mayo had dripped down my shirt and onto my black jeans. The extra mayo that for all intended purposes was supposed to emulate wads of cum. Fuck this. I didn't feel sexxy anymore, and i didn't think anyone was fantasizing about how many hot dogs i could fit in my mouth without trying either. The bus gets there, so i get on and head the fuck home.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Then smash those flirtinis on the ground and throw that cosmopolitan in the air.
Walk to your nearest corner beer store, hand them $2 and pick up a Hurricane.
Baby boy Hurricane is my main squeeze, and seduces me every time.
He keeps me warm during these cold winter months.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Next week we shoot hardcore hunk, Brendy.
Baby Girl Xavier is a fag who plays beer pong
Early in the morning I have to haul my ass to trainings in a windowless room from 9-5. Although the topic of the training is useful to me, I can't help but be distracted. By what?
An adorable boy, nut just any typical cute boy but during the introduction/ice breaker I find out that is a LIBRARIAN!
SHUT THE FUCK UP! RIGHT?
(So I basically have a new fantasy of the week now)
This brunette mid-twenty something year old, adorably dorky boy in a collared shirt with thin white and red stripes which from a distance makes it appear pink , tucked into his blue Dickie's with a modest black belt that is holding them up further than they should but that is okay with me in hopes of seeing a bulge.
I get gay vibes but they could also just be that I know the fantasy of sucking his dick in between bookshelves might be the only thing that is going to get me through the duller parts of the training.
Some moments of the day I feel his eyes on me, you know? and then I look back at him and he looks away, but then again I sometimes run wild with my imagination, like the idea that he is a total Aries AND a power top who is all quiet and cute in person but in bed is totally aggressive and will throw me down and take control.
Maybe he will ask me to lunch, maybe I'll ask him to lunch. Alas I am on my lunch writing this blog.
**This is not him but I googled male librarian and he came up and I totally wanna do him too
Friday, March 6, 2009
kevin(str8 man): what's our song?
me: poker face. duh! come here yr homegirl is here.
kevin(str8 man): I fucking wish i miss u but no i cant its my friends bday
me: Ew. come sit on my face and get over it
kevin(str8 man): I fucking love u so much
me: whatever, i love you too, lets hang out this weekend
kevin(str8 man): I promise! This weekend. When im not working.
pretty much he is a hot man that can take it. i even tell him i want to objectify him and he loves it.
this city is only filled with good straight men and one day i'll meet the one of my dreams and he will only be gay for me.
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Leave the night so swiftly and I still am here to review the travesty which was Bob and Barbabra's, a drag show that barely contained what I consider drag and bordered on what we might call cabaret but unfourtunetly we don't review that subject. Although the drink special allowed us loose tongues, I did not pay much attention to my drinks, to the other faggots there to get a good sense of who was doing what, like I could care more when "poker face" was playing and all i could do was text my EX that "his" song was playing, in the hope he would be disgusted, that only proved to my disadvantage because he claims he never heard the song which i considered a typical Aries move to prove that he did know but so typical to him to say he never heard it, therefore he said it was my song.
So anyways off that tangent, our new editor of our fiction/poetry/creative writing, he is a tall drink of whiskey, i bought him a few drinks and realized he is a good man and needs a good man, so i salute him in his hope of finding one in this city and to editing our fucked up zine!
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
SOOOOO we just had a meeting with the people at the Bike Stop and we found out we are pretty sure our first party Finger Banger and our CUM RAG RELEASE party will be held there at the Bike Stop (on Quince Alley, Between Walnut and Chesnut/Between 11th St and 12th St) on APRIL 18TH!!!!. Where we also will be releasing our first issue of CUM RAG!!! We will be playing mostly punk oriented stuff like 77, 80's, Riot Grrrl...eh really whatever we feel
SO lesson learned, all those boys who walk around in basketball shorts in snowy fucking weather aren't just crazy style retarded. They're also all down to fuck, and more than willing to suck. Apparently, basketball practice teaches you more than how to catch a ball and shoot a hoop. You also learn how to play with the big boys and catch a mean shot... to the face.
Monday, March 2, 2009
I think I will stick to my normal taste of straight punk boys that I usually lust over, like one in my living room playing drums on rock band. The first thing I noticed about him after his hot face was his clean white socks that he had on and he wasnt wearing shoes. Now I don't have a thing for feet but clean white socks get me. New dream boy for me, wearing nothing but clean white socks and tattoos. I am SO into it.
Sunday, March 1, 2009
so I woke up drunk still, got stoned and realized on my couch laying there was my dream lover, hot straight man JON ABBOT, I think i might have waken him up by blasting gypsy by fleetwood mac or running down the hall yelling to my roommate "HOW DID I GET HOME LAST NIGHT?!" And as I got my answer to previous question on how I got home, I also got told the story on what I did upon arriving back at home base. Apparently I went up to the hot straight man and yelled at him "YOU ARE A TEASE! I SPEAK FOR THE WHOLE GAY COMMUNITY" then after verbally assulting the man I threw my phone and a notebook at him also hitting my roommate, then grabbing my roommate hugging her telling her I was sorry and it was aimed at Jon, I told her I loved her, then turned to Jon Abbot and telling him I hated him, which is simply hate manifested by drunken sexual frustation. ANYWAYS, I want to celebrate this man and I told him so...since I lost my hope for any fags in this city I still have one of my dream men on my mind..so he is sitting in my living room playing guitar hero and playing with my emotions and if only he knew the things i would let him do to me....I told him he was gonna be on here is this creepy? whatever...so Jon Abbot here's to you!
That's him with my friend who is a witch, I asked her to put a gay spell on him, she said that would come back to me X3
Here he is in my home state of California, and too think I gave up my bed and slept on the couch for him!
Anyways on top of being the hottest man in the tri-state area, he is also a really nice guy who actually lets me get away with saying all kinds of this shit in front of his face and drunkly let out my drunk sexual agression by pelting him with items from my purse. But he would do anything for anyone and has a good heart...god i hate him